Wallflower

(image credit here)

You stood there

head bowed

back straight

pink-tinted cheeks

You held the gaze

of every heart

Everyone envied

the wall that was your friend

Everyone wanted

to be that one guy

that would raise your head

and make you smile

But you were busy looking

For patterns in the dust

Too scared to see constellations

In somebody else’s eyes

You were so busy

Making yourself small

But you were everything but

Unnoticed and invisible

I wish I could tell you

All the things I’ve said

But this whole conversation

Was all in my head

For I was leaning

Against the opposite wall

Nursing a drink to my chest

And wishing I wasn’t so tall

I wish I could tell you

How pretty you look

Or how the lights made your freckles

And your dress light up the room

Or how the sweep of your eyelashes

Against your cheeks

Made me want to be brave

And make small talk

Everyone wanted to hear

How the wallflower speaks

Was it a whisper to the heart

Or a shout to the universe?

But you are a wallflower

And I’m more of a weed

But the walls are our anchors

Our ports, our barriers

The room was too big

To be too close to you

The room was too small

To be right next to you

I thank time and space

For bringing us here

Awkward but not cold

Quiet but not alone

But the universe can

Only push me so much

I am too attached

To my wall and familiarity

So when I saw you

That night at that party

Both of us not knowing

Why we were there

I can only look

Stop, and then stare

Too scared to try and ruin

What I built in my head

Imaginary happiness is best

Without the emotional baggage

For you are a wallflower

Beautiful, but not fleeting

And I was once

a non-believer

But the chance I got

To see your smiles

Across the room

Made me think

That you were a flower

With you own sun

And your existence was

What blooming really is